Who Were The Surprises?

Lets just discuss the surprises on the list. The real surprises. Wally Joyner? Are you fucking kidding me. I always liked him. He could hit the baseball...but was never in my mind as a steroid user. I found it funny to not only think about him, but think about him as a juicer. Now that I think about it I believe he had 20 bombs in RBI Baseball.
Fernando Vina? My only hope is that he will be too embarrassed about this to continue on as a Baseball Tonight analyst because he is FUCKING BRUTAL! I would rather listen to Tim Hardaway discuss The Cold War with Lavar Arrington.
Hal Morris? I was going to say that I didnt think he had more than 6 bombs in a season until I looked it up. He did have a stretch where he hit 10, 11, 16. I wonder which years he was "strength training"?
A couple guys I played with were on the list. I played with Larry Bigbie one summer in Ohio. He was probably the best all around player I have ever been around. Fast as shit. Had a cannon. Hit like Ted Williams. I never would have thought he would have done it. I never blame any of these guys. If I was in their position I am 90% sure I would have done it.
I played with Ryan Jorgensen one summer in Kansas. He was getting ready to head to LSU from a Junior College and started his first "cycle" when we were in Nevada. He was a catcher and was the quickest I have ever seen to second. I remember having conversations with him about sticking that needle in your ass. By the end of the summer he had quite a noticable jaw line. Pretty Crazy.
Oh Mo Vaughn. I do a great Mo Vaughn imitation. He could mash.
Really you can believe it from a lot of guys. There are many more...and I don't know what this report did except punish guys and hold them accountable. Whether or not the are suspended is besides the point. The punishment is in the embarrassment.
They will all deny it. Reminds me of these crazy fucking middle schoolers. They will lie their asses off. You could be sitting at a table with them and watch them throw a bowl of mashed potatoes across the cafeteria. When you ask them why they did it they simply answer...I didn't do nothing.

Radiohead [mp3] No Surprises (live)